Snark It Up, FuzzBall!

It’s the 4th of July, and usually we’re treated to the Keane Kids doing something inane for the holidays.  They’re doing it (putting up the “decorations of independence”), and there’s a smattering of strips featuring fireworks and such.

And they there’s Zits, which decides to focus on bodily functions as its holiday treat.  Yeah, like a strip featuring a lazy teenage boy and a dad who looks like he’s two or three pen-strokes from transforming into a Plugger man-bear, didn’t already cross this bridge without having to illustrate its point with whoopie cushions.

Ick.

And here I thought I’d never have a use for whoopie cushions in a mashup.  HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY, folks! Have a happy and safe one!

Lu Ann Powers (blonde resident of Apartment 3-G) shares a birthday with another famous favorite beloved comic strip character! Lord only knows who’s more honored and/or horrified…

And if it isn’t bad enough that we have to stare at Lu Ann’s vacant visage, in addition to Ziggy’s sweet, sweet ghastly one, the Comics Curmudgeon’s faithful commenter Red Greenback revisits the Linski estate for more confectionary horror (Go, Red! Go!):

And definitely NOT saving the best for last…

Mary Worth finally takes over this miserable “Liza Stalks Dr. Drew (Manwhore!)” plot.  And you can’t get much meddlier than at the corner bistro…

[All sorts of groveling apologies to Edward Hopper, the estate of Edward Hopper, the Chicago Institute of Art…]

Or maybe it’s just “38D-licious,” in ice cream shoppe jargon!

…I have no idea.

I’m sure Bob Weber, Jr. is disavowing any knowledge of promoting art in his strip, Slylock Fox.

Special thanks to CC’s Gold-Digging Nanny, who has a plethora (or in this case, a metric butt-ton) of Slylock Fox ‘toons at her site,  I Found All Six!

The Comics Curmudgeon‘s Walker of Dog commented on how creepy it is that Kit Walker (aka, The Phantom; aka, The Ghost Who Practices Self-Mutilation) is drawn without eyes whenever he’s unmasked; usually he puts on a pair of sunglasses (YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!), or his face is shown in shadow.

I’m not too concerned with this, figuring this is a device to show how mysteriously mysterious The Phantom (aka, The Ghost Who’s Probably on the Lam from Something) is.  But to allay Walker of Dog’s creeps, there might be a more logical explanation.

So when Cayla and Les agreed to “take a break,” it’s a hot time in the ol’ town tonight.

Eh, not so much.

love is… is not on my reading list.  I try to avoid it at all costs?  Why? Because it’s saccharine, puerile, and badly drawn?

No.  Because it gives me ideas.   As opposed to the theme song of HBO’s True Blood, I do NOT want to “do bad things with you.”  Nope… I want to do bad things to you.”

The first is a given.  It really didn’t need to be dressed up for just about every commenter at CC to give the alternate caption, so this is dedicated to all of those fine folks.

No one commented on this one.   I’m pretty sure this strip has devolved into “Here’s your pistol. There’s the fish-filled barrel.  Knock yourself out.”

And pointing to your butt IS one way to say “bottom” (in this context) in ASL. No kidding!