THIS is what happens when Josh, the Comics Curmudgeon himself, mentions that he’s off on his annual week of Hanuchrismwaanza celebration. No mention of Uncle Lumpy tending the store (or minding the asylum), so there are rumors that Sneaky, the Klepto Raccoon an’ Andy’s (the Saint Bernard, not Rex Morgan’s pal) buddy, will be keeping us in line.
One raccoon vs. a horde of Curminions? One word: rabies.
We’ll be good, Josh.
UPDATE: This was originally published on 23 December 2008. But at last Sneaky has his very own song!
“The Ballad of Sneaky Raccoon”
Now somewhere in the green tree-filled land of Lost Forest
There lived a procyon named Sneaky Raccoon
One day his crawdads were stolen by another guy
Young Sneaky was hungry, Sneaky didn’t like that
He said I’m gonna get that boy
One day he walked to the cabin
And slipped himself into an open window
Sneaky Raccoon checked out the main room
Only to find old Mark Trail
Sneaky was mad, lots of sharp teeth he had
That dumb kid he was gonna assail
That kid and his pup on his crawdads did sup
Which made Sneaky very contrary
Mrs. Trail was there with nice black-and-blue hair
And everyone knew her as Cherry
She was sort of busty, her son’s name was Rusty
(He was smart as a bowl of squirrel stew)
Sneaky burst in and growling like sin
He said Rusty boy I’m gonna bite you
But that Rusty was weird – he cried “I’m askeered!”
And Mark Trail grabbed Sneaky’s ringed tail
Cherry’s dad wandered by, thought it best not to pry
But then he spied pancakes on the table
He said, Sneaky you met your match
And Sneaky said, This is just a rough patch
I’ll take down that boy as soon as I’m able
Sneaky — poor sod!– he was chained to a log
So much for his try at reprisal
Andy rescued him (the one not totally dim)
And helped with young Sneaky’s survival
Doot doodly doo doot doodly dee…