Snark It Up, FuzzBall!

…on suddenly-happy-but-still-craving-attention Dawn by finding someone new to amble around Charterstone.

This may only be a May-December friendship, but no one could even speculate on the Mary-Dawn catastrophe was…

And just when you think Dawn was headed for the thing that is Jared:

But not to worry….someone is always lurking in the cattails…

And, although you didn’t hear it from me, but I think we’re at the end of “Dawn Falls in Love (no, I really mean it this time)”…

Nope, Dawn is still there, pawing at Mary.

FINALLY!!!!

…into the summer season…Happy Memorial Day, folks!

And you know, no matter what Dolly is told, she’s going to screw up the story again…

The Keanes are apparently anti-vaxxers, for man and beast alike…

Meanwhile, home-schooling is serving Billy well…he’s learning the art of negotiation!

…this story is never going to end.

The Keanes have a FUNNY one-panel comic. The dialog is right, the drawing’s right (PJ looking a little hesitant as how all of this is going to play out)…how can one improve it?

Okay, I REALLY considered leaving it alone, but you know, that’s just not me.

I have no idea what’s going on in The Phantom…okay, long story short:
Kit and Devil found the wounded lion; Kit put it down mercifully (the lion didn’t go down without a fight). Kit and Devil ate the lion’s heart to honour it, as Llongo warriors do; Devil went to sleep beside the lion’s carcass; he and Kit slept through the night; Kit woke up the next morning to find the lion gone…and now it’s back!!
(I’m speculating that something hit Kit on the head (coconut?), and this is a hallucination…)

There was also a beautiful panel of Devil sleeping beside the lion…some thing just can’t be parodied.

An attempt to find the dead lion turns up nothing (hint: don’t go “soakin” at any place with Forbidden in its name, Kit)…

I knew nothign good was going to come from a long “soak”; you can be a realy jerk, Kit.

Someone has been lurking around Phantom’s little lagoon o’ laziness!

Ah, Man’s best friend (who gets cheesed off at back-handed compliments):

My Gosh! The Phantom keeps wandeding…will the madness never end?!??

No, I guess not.

…which is to say “not very much.”

It’s hard to decide…does Dawn want to spill her guts or gloat to Mary? Maybe she’s just looking for a free hand-out.

And has all this soul-searching and clarity-seeking caused Dawn to grow up, even a teensy bit?

“Who’s sick of Mary?”
“WE ARE! WE ARE!“

Dammitall! Dawn just can’t keep from telling anything that’ll listen how wondeful Jared is. Fortunately, only Mary appears cornered at the moment.

The Weston I.Q. just keeps spiraling down, down, downward…

We DESERVE a pool-party, after all this miserable excuse for young (yeah, right) love!! While I was on hiatus, something thrilling supposedly happened!
(A) Mary dives in to save li’l Jeffy Keane!
(B) Mary cives in to save the octopus and/or calamari from weak-bladdered Jeffy Keane!
(C) Who dares? Maybe she’ll drown!
WHO CARES?!?? WE DESERVE IT!!

…Luann’s mom is now a bar-fly (but she gets paid for it), so Luann and her dad have to split the domestic duties. Which means Luann has to pretend how to cook. Thank heavens some random guy bumps into her, so her can be oh-so-cutely distracted!

Meanwhile, Mama DeGroot is having less than a good time at work, having a miserable time with Ann Eiffel, who only wants to “help” run the bistro well (like well into the ground). Mrs. DeGroot finally (yay!) tell Ann to hit the bricks — who knew it was meant literally?

That’s right…the Spencers! And all of the cast of Juggs Parker!

And why is that?

Because the plots are turgid! At least Sophie is wallowing in self-pity and teen-age angst and…and…well, Sophie’s the same as she ever was, too.

…even seeps into the Pluggerverse.

Which leads us to the man —> man-dog —> loser pizza-shop owner.

This kinda freaked me out, or at least gave me a short-lived goosebump reaction:

What needs to be said (although one of the folks from FB’s Readers of the Comics Curmudgeon is pretty sure that Pluggers will prevent Earth from joining the United Federation of Planets someday…)

Merely “an obervation…”

…Moy has run out of ideas. Mary Worth is dead. Everyone at Charterstone (except for Wilbut, his ladyfriend and Libby) is dead. All of Santa Royale is dead. It’s a pandemic of Dumb, people! Why do you thing Dawn and Jerod are still in the airport?!??

Well, it looks like either Dawn and/or Jerod are bored with standing around the airport terminal…time to head home!

Evidently, Jerod manages to slip by the Elephant Man, and it’s time to head home some more!

Even a blind pig finds the occasional acorn: