By bats | June 3, 2020 - 6:02 pm

The Phantom keeping his clothes on while continuing to hallucinate, Andy the dog stranded miles and miles from Lost Forest, the Melonheads continuing to be Melonheads, and Mary having to deal with a frustrated Toby and/or a lonely old Saul Wynter and/or a snotty teenager?

Nope, I don’t know, either. But a Phantom/Mary Worth mashup will do for the meantime.

Kit’s been having a rough time; evidently the Spirit of Past Phantoms has been haunting him and telling him what a crummy job he’s done with his kids, his legacy, and so forth. Yeah, YOU try doing this in a purple leotard and striped undies-on-the outside!

While this has freaked out Kit at the beginning, there only so much crap anyone can deal with, even as the crap grows higher and deeper:

We just can’t leave Boney McBones hanging, can we?

Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like Kit’s leaving anytime soon. Maybe his host is lonesome…

And then some folks suggested that Boney Marony ought to start terrorizing other people (and critters). I figured going after Wilbut Weston would be too easy…

I don’t know if Kit is attempting to fight back, or if he’s just letting his Ghost with the Most set the scene.

It looks like Kit is being pretty smart and heading for the exit. Whether he succeeds is anyone’s guess (and Devil doesn’t seem confident).

What a frightening week it’s been! Kit has been harassed and harangued by a gruesome apparition…and you know what the most terrifying thing of all is?

You guessed it: those sad ‘n’ sorry saggy purple tights worn by Old Man Phantom!

Oh, boy! I think we’re finally free of the Haunted Forest of Llongo, and Kit and his buddies (and his dog. and his horse, and an elephant!) are heading to a safe place!

And yet, Guran feels the need to tell Kit the secret of the Llongo Forest, and Kit feels the need to question why he keeps hanging around the Llongo people to start with:

Comments Off on Is this what the summer forebodes?
By bats | June 1, 2020 - 3:42 pm
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

David Hurst, one of the folks at FB’s Readers of the Comics Curmudgeon, did an absolutely, knock-down, platinum take on this new story. (So it refers to a comment Jared had made once…who cares? this is golden!)

Comments Off on I think I’m losing hope already
By bats | May 27, 2020 - 12:13 pm

…on suddenly-happy-but-still-craving-attention Dawn by finding someone new to amble around Charterstone.

This may only be a May-December friendship, but no one could even speculate on the Mary-Dawn catastrophe was…

And just when you think Dawn was headed for the thing that is Jared:

But not to worry….someone is always lurking in the cattails…

And, although you didn’t hear it from me, but I think we’re at the end of “Dawn Falls in Love (no, I really mean it this time)”…

Nope, Dawn is still there, pawing at Mary.

FINALLY!!!!

Comments Off on Mary calls it quits…
By bats | May 24, 2020 - 1:18 pm
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

…this story is never going to end.

Comments Off on Kill me now…
By bats | May 20, 2020 - 11:51 am
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

…which is to say “not very much.”

It’s hard to decide…does Dawn want to spill her guts or gloat to Mary? Maybe she’s just looking for a free hand-out.

And has all this soul-searching and clarity-seeking caused Dawn to grow up, even a teensy bit?

“Who’s sick of Mary?”
WE ARE! WE ARE!

Dammitall! Dawn just can’t keep from telling anything that’ll listen how wondeful Jared is. Fortunately, only Mary appears cornered at the moment.

The Weston I.Q. just keeps spiraling down, down, downward…

We DESERVE a pool-party, after all this miserable excuse for young (yeah, right) love!! While I was on hiatus, something thrilling supposedly happened!
(A) Mary dives in to save li’l Jeffy Keane!
(B) Mary cives in to save the octopus and/or calamari from weak-bladdered Jeffy Keane!
(C) Who dares? Maybe she’ll drown!
WHO CARES?!?? WE DESERVE IT!!

Comments Off on The romance that is Santa Royale…
By bats | May 12, 2020 - 12:19 pm
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy, Uncategorized

…Moy has run out of ideas. Mary Worth is dead. Everyone at Charterstone (except for Wilbut, his ladyfriend and Libby) is dead. All of Santa Royale is dead. It’s a pandemic of Dumb, people! Why do you thing Dawn and Jerod are still in the airport?!??

Well, it looks like either Dawn and/or Jerod are bored with standing around the airport terminal…time to head home!

Evidently, Jerod manages to slip by the Elephant Man, and it’s time to head home some more!

Even a blind pig finds the occasional acorn:

Comments Off on Face facts…
By bats | May 6, 2020 - 3:55 pm
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

Four hours? Seven hours? Two weeks? A month! I guess it’s long enough for us to get reacquainted with Jerod and remember just how contemptible he is!

I suppose the take-home message is that the flight may take a long time, but air travel is at least 110% safe! Just relax, Jerod…Dawn will be touching down at the Santa Royale International Airport/Waffle House in minutes or hours or something…

HOUR 46 of Dawn’s NY to Santa Royal flight…and Jerod has the sads again:

Oh, those mean doctors! As if Jerod doesn’t have enough on his plate!

Home again! Home again! Just watch out for Dawn’s jet skidding the Pacific…

Comments Off on How long from NYC to Santa Royale?
By bats | May 5, 2020 - 11:01 am
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

…and if that doesn’t work: “So long, Screwy — see ya in St. Louie!

Homeward bound! Can you believe it? It’s been such a grea…..oh. Look. It’s Jerod.

Comments Off on Au revoir…
By bats | April 27, 2020 - 1:10 pm
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

Well, maybe. Dawn “needs to talk” to Hugo. Hugo? He’d just rather have a rouleau bon marché et vide de sens dans le foin. Viva la sexe!

Oh, what a weeping Wilma! Hugo (briefly) thinks that he may be the cause of Dawn’s distress, but she’s as clueless as she has been for the last 15 years (or more) of her 20s.

Pepe Le Hugo is heroic to the last, even if Dawn has lowered le boom on him.

Of course, there’s a little le boom coming from Hugo as well…

Well, I think we ought to be very, very happy that Dawn and Hugo will remain friends (long-distance relationships can be so brutal!). And let’s cap off an expensive French dinner with cheap American ice cream…sorta like this whole escapade.

So we have to say goodbye for the summer…

Comments Off on Finally!
By bats | April 20, 2020 - 10:31 am
Posted in Category: Most maryWorthy

Why on earth did I think anything would HAPPEN in a Sunday Mary Worth? Worse yet, we’re being treated to several panels that are REPRINTS (yes, honest to Dieu REPRINTS) of the earlier week’s strips! How do you say “lazy”? Paresseux will work…
Bob Weber, Jr., could get a few “find six differences” puzzles from the three panels re-used here.

OH! But maybe….

I wonder how you say “ohpleaseohpleaseohplease” in French?

I told my friends that I was abandoning this story line in Mary Worth because it was just so repetitious and boring. But I seemed to have lied (honestly, I thought the writer would get disgusted with the plot and characters, too!).

I sense a great disturbance in the Force…or may Hugo is just getting tired (really, really tired) of his American paramour) Dawn. I know I am.

Oh, boy! It’s time to strap on the old feedbag again!

And the end of another endless week. What will the Devil’s boit await them?

Comments Off on The ennui…she goes on…