Frankly, we don’t know how long ago Mary Worth’s childhood was, and we can only wish it were far, far away. Still plagued with platitudes it is, yes…
After the last few weeks of Mary Worth’s pontificatin’ and platitudizin’, I feel like I’ve been in a bomb shelter. Is this particular story arc (such as it is) over? Is the radiation level at an acceptable level?
I couldn’t get really worked up over this, but here are a few attempts in response to little Mary’s dreadful upbringing, having Mother Hubbard as a parent (I’m pleased with my little salute to Spring, even if Mary said nothing about it — rather like the Foobiverse missing April’s birthday (geez, birthdays are important to teens!) and suddenly being confronted with the possibility of being touched by another human being!
Having a (more often than not random) quotation scrawled across Mary Worth airspace is bad enough, but one Sunday there were TWO! of them! Good heavens! I had to retaliate! Mary might have a copy of Bartlett’s, but I’ve got the whole internet! Bwahahahaha!
Can you pick out Mary’s platitudes of the day?
I know, I know. There was some faint, dark fantasy in all of us that somehow we’d be spared from Mary’s incessant platitudes, by any means possible. Only Mary is stronger than us all.
Dr. Drew, Manwhore!, returns! In only a few months, he’s mature, a little sadder and wiser, and he’s ready to profess his undying love for the woman of his dreams, Dawn Vera. I, for one, am rooting for him.
Platitudes around Mary Worth are as common as flies around a trashcan. But here in an election year, not only do we have to endure the Mother Goddess of Meddling but also politicians — oh, the horror! (Is it November yet?)
And for the record, what the skeevy senator in Panel 3 says is untouched by snarky hands or Photoshop. Comedy gold!
A tip o’ the helmet hair to CC’s Joe Blevins for the ‘inspiration’ (as if Mary isn’t inspiring enough!). I think we all miss K-TEL records.
