Snark It Up, FuzzBall!

Mark Trail! The Amazing Spiderman!

Actually, if we really want to be honest, it should be Sorta Amazing Mark Trail! The Pretty Lame Spiderman!

(And that’s “Sorta Amazing” in a “You’ve Got to Be Kidding Me” way…)  Nevertheless, who would’ve guessed that diamonds trumped everything this week in the comics?

Wedding plans plod ahead in Mary Worth, Rex Morgan tries to head Mayor Stu’s prostate off at the pass, who the hell knows what’s going on in Apartment 3-G, and Judge Parker isn’t apparently making enough money from writing to live in luxury.

Screw ’em.

What we need is good ol’ , with his good ol’ back-to-basics folksy knowledge, and his good ol’ good ol’iness…

…(well, as much as Mark Trail ever comes to reality), no politicians had their clocks cleaned by the Fist o’ Justice.  Nice.  Once again, People Like Frank get off free and easy…no divorce from fed-up wife, no restraining order from stepdaughter Rustina, probably got a really sweet deal on a gas-guzzling SUV from a local car dealership for being such a “champion” of wildlife.

Like I said, nice.  And Mark agrees:

It’s okay, Mark.  Dream a little fantasy for us all:

Frank Johnson was going to get even with Mark!  (boo!)

He was going to go so far as run Mark’s jeep off the road! And kill Mark!  (boo!)

But he swerved to miss a deer (commonly referred to as “Nature’s Windshield Wiper”)!  (yay!)

And he drove off a cliff! (boo!…no, wait…)

But Mark saved him!  (Huh?)

whew…

This way to the denouement.

Looks-sorta-like-dead-Lisa is nothing if  not tenacious:

Months of Searching! Danger! Crazy lady ship captain stalking Kit! at last come to an exciting climax!

Pardon me while I go and floss…

Gee whiz, you guys !  WHAT IS IT GOING TO TAKE?!?

The only question is: Which is which?

Someone over at The Comics Curmudgeon (sorry, I’ve forgotten the name — if you read this, let me know, so I can give credit where credit is due!) mentioned that the prostate-oriented chatter was pretty boring,  and if we had to endure it, why couldn’t it be punctuated with great histrionic panels, like the Mayor’s wife Rose having a melt-down over the phone.  That is true.

The same individual speculated that a coffee cup with Rose becoming a complete and total shamble would look good on a coffee cup.  Also true.

Unfortunately, I don’t think we’re going to be seeing this any time soon over at Cafe’ Press:

The Comics Curmudgeon Josh F. did an excellent evaluation of the Sunday “throwaway” panel of Mary Worth, and it’s worth (snort!) a look at his commentary (you can see the original there, too), as “Escape from Death Towers”:   http://joshreads.com/?p=8477

My analysis? Something less elegant:

…ah, forget that.

When Pardon My Planet gives you this:

how can you (read, I) resist?

(This is going to be a huge thread…)

Why?

It’s a freakin’ Rex Morgan opportunity, for one!

That means some new friends:

(Yes, it is surprisingly difficult to put a tumor in bikini panties.)

And even some old friends — really old friends (yay, Count Morgu!):