No, really! We attended the National Hardware Show in Las Vegas in early May. Over 2300 vendors. Like a Home Depot on steroids. Maybe I’ll post more photos (even though photography wasn’t permitted on the trade show floor, you’d think I could’ve found better pictures of this dazzling lass online — geez, hardware guys aren’t as geeky and drooly as computer guys as I’d thought) — you had to see this, though.
Good lord, I can hear the muffled chuckles all the way from Lost Forest…
Geez, when even Cherry’s in on the ruse…you’re sunk, Rusty.
In Monday’s strip, Mark actually talks to Rusty about going on a fishing trip (well, after checking his e-mail, which I think is short for “eagle mail,” in which Mark communes with the mighty bald eagle for no apparent reason).
Of course, I’m not going to show you the actual strip (check out 7 May 2012 if you don’t believe me). What I will show you is a mashup of the strip, very much inspired by CC’s Illustrator Steve (words) and CC’s gnemec (hot, hot illustration — check out The Comics Curmudgeon for all the gory details that led to that magnificent photo: http://joshreads.com/?p=13534 .
And if all this Curminion cleverness doesn’t leave you reeling, here’s a fantabulous parody by CC’s Shrug. Hit it!
“And the Giant Squirrel’s in the Cradle”
Rusty arrived in the strip one day
Appeared on the scene in a hideous way
But Mark had geese to chase and Cherry to shun
Rusty had to make his own sad fun
And he was ugly and we knew it, and as dumb as a rock
He’d say “We’re going fishing soon, Mark
And you know we’re gonna fix the dock!”And the dog’s Up North and so is Trail,
Little boy left with epic fail,
“When you comin’ home Mark?”
“I don’t know when, but we’ll fix the dock up then, son,
You know we’ll fix the dock up then.”The boy cheered up just the other day
He said, “Glad you’re home, Mark, and gonna stay,
Can we fish together?” Mark said “Not today,
Off to Canada,” he said “That’s okay”
And he walked away but his smile hid a snark,
And he said, “I’m gonna be like you, Mark,
Yeah, you know I’m gonna be like Mark.”And the dog’s Up North and so is Trail,
Little boy left with epic fail,
“When you comin’ home Mark?”
“I don’t know when, but we’ll fix the dock up then, son,
You know we’ll fix the dock up then.”Mark’s still Up North, and the kid and all
Are still back home with the Jack Elrod ball,
And the sunken dock with the broken logs,
And the mutant fish and squirrels and frogs,
And the magazine check that’s overdue,
And they all wait around for you, Mark,
And the readers have to wait around too.And the dog’s Up North and so is Trail,
Little boy left with epic fail,
“When you comin’ home Mark?”
“I don’t know when, but we’ll fix the dock up then, son,
You know we’ll fix the dock up then.”And Andy stops to sniff a tree,
And McQueen’s well-liked in the commun-itee,
The fish are biting off Johnny’s pier,
And Kelly sees Mark and starts to leer,
Are you ever gonna get that article in?
You know the plot will have to end right then, Mark,
Since it will be the End Times then.
…and you don’t even have to go to church (unless they serve donuts afterward)!
Plus, a little Bit o’ Wisdom from CC’s own June Morgan (or someone Wise like her), Sequitur!
Mark Trail’s thrilling Reefer Madness tale got all kind of done with him whacking one bad guy (bald) in the head with a stick while Andy mauled the other bad guy (longish hair, circa 1970s). No facial hair, no Fist of Justice, I guess.
So it wasn’t as exciting as we all might’ve been hoping, but there’s nothing quite like a father-mutant chat on the old porch as the sun sets in Lost Forest…because we all know that tomorrow will bring a new and exhilarating adventure pancakes!
But here’s some late-breaking news! Never let it be said that Mark is not a Man of His Word (okay, not contracted words, but still, a Man of His Word!):
Or is the passenger seated next to Mary getting a little frisky? The road to Meddle-Con takes to the skies…
…and then to the streets of New York!
And all of this would’ve been SO much better had Mary channeled her favorite femme fatale from the matinee, Miss Bette Davis…
