Snark It Up, FuzzBall!

Pose. Pose. Pose.

That’s right, June.

Painting is not a great way to spend one’s time.  Well, neither is sitting in front of the computer mashing up stuff.  But sometimes good things come when you least expect it.  During a vulpine investigation, for example.

Wow, I’ve been wasting my short time on Earth adding to this blog for a whole year!  I’d been doing mashups for some time before, but this has been a cheap fabulous way of setting them down in pixels and hoping that they’re making some folks laugh…or chuckle…or groan…or scratch their heads.

I don’t even have a mashup to commemorate Anniversary #1, but hey, June Morgan is in a bikini today, so maybe that’ll inspire me (I say “inspire,” because considering how June looks in a bikini, I think I’d just be depressed otherwise…).

Okay, I lied.  Well, no, I just got inspired.  And the more I looked at the first panel in the 3 April strip, the more I wondered why we can’t see ANY of June in the mirror.  Of course the bathroom in her cabin is larger than any of the ones in MY HOUSE, so that could have something to do with it, but I prefer a more logical reason (a bathroom that large for the run-of-the-mill cruise guest is hardly logical, after all).

Thanks to Josh F., The Comics Curmudgeon hisself, for his great blog, and to Dean Booth, whose mashups first inspired me and continue to do so several years after discovering just how PhotoShop can be abused! (also to mr. bats :[ who puts up with these doodles and at least pretends to follow all the convoluted plot machinations in Mary Worth and Rex Morgan et al. when I start sputtering about them; True Fable ‘cuz he’s sweet; Mooncattie, who’s also sweet and doesn’t mind appearing in the occasional mashup (right?); and a whole buncha CC folks who I know drop in here!)

Let’s see, Ghost-Who-Cruises-and-Tries-to-Look-Like-Indiana-Jones is still on board a completely computerized ship with
— his steroidal children,
— a hold full of Croccos,
— the mystical Old Man Mozz, and
— a ship’s captain who is beginning to fantasize about his unspandexed ass.

I doubt that this will develop into a chick-fight with Mrs. Phantom (we can always hope), but the possibility for romance springs eternal!  This might not be The Love Boat, but it’s not like the Morgan clan is batting .1000 on its little Caribbean excursion, either.

aka, Quit Feeding Me Straight Lines!

This is the site’s 500th post! Great Googly Moogly!

Sure, I could do some cheap and tawdry, get-a-quick-laugh mashup, but isn’t it better that a cautionary tale to aspiring cartoonists take this space?  Anyway, to all aspiring cartoonists, illustrators, muralists, and graffi-artists:  Nostril Upshots don’t look good on anyone.

No matter how difficult it might be to believe that Rex and June procreated, and that Sarah is the product of their loins (shudder), there are other ways of demonstrating relatedness.  If I have to pull out one of my old college genetics textbooks, I will.  I swear I will.

…when a plot makes a glacier’s advance look like the Indy 500.  Mary Worth is usually the Queen of the Grind (maybe because she’s so old and tottering contributes to such things), but lately, the (in)action in Rex Morgan, M.D. is hovering (very, very slowly) around empty donut wrappers and Second Officer Guido Tomas’ apparent reluctance to find the stowaway boy.

Hey, buddy, the strike is over! Back to niggly little jobs that delight and amuse the clientele! Capise? We want smarmy, immature humor, lots of it (not unlike a cruise ship buffet), and we want it now!!

Ahh, that’s better.  And if it’s not enough that the situations might be smarmy, Second Officer Tomas is acting a little more secretive (closeted, you might say) than usual, too…

There’s nothing quite like a comic strip that has its titular character MIA (well, aside from Garfield, Marvin, Edison Lee, Ziggy…).  Mary Worth has been cooling her heels at the Charterstone pool, it seems, while Adrian and her fiance Ted are hashing things out about the upcoming nuptials.  Aside from some money problems, things look all rosy, just in time for a spring wedding!

Or do they?  This is Mary Worth, after all.

[Okay, I’ll say one thing.  I don’t understand those people who luuuuuve crapola like “Love Is…”, and FOOB with dying Farley and strokey Grandpa Jim, and Funky WInkerbean’s dead Lisa and eternally-mourning Les … and then find Lio creepy and sinister.]

Luann is another strip I ignore, except for when the folks at the Comics Curmudgeon start raking it over the coals for the cock-teasing antics of the girls and the cluelessness of the boys.  Brad and Toni work together as firefighters and have been having this not-quite-sexual relationship, which leads to all sorts of tired hackneyed boring shenanigans.