Another short foray into the realm of ReFOOB and I’ll remember my past just like I want to: my husband was a rat-bastard, I’m a virtual martyr, my children were filthy little animals, and, oh, my husband was a rat-bastard.
Yep, that just about covers it.
…the more would-be sluts will slip through your fingers.”
I think this was the line in the R-rated version of Star Wars.
Anyway, I think both Mary Worth and Lawrence the Famous Lecturer-Husband are finding this out the hard way. Okay, Delilah does call Lawrence, and the conversation is punctuated by nasty scowls on Lawrence’s part and snarky commentary made to his wife (no kidding…look up the 20 July 2009 strip).
And making Delilah into a U.S.D.A. Grade-A Tramp? Is it fun? You bet it is!
[In the event that you’re having a difficult time deciding, Delilah, Mooncattie would like it known that his car is paid for.]
This being Mary Worth, the conversation goes on and on and on. In real life, someone would’ve hung up by now. But it makes for keen mashups!
I think I’ll start a collection of comic books that feature comic strip characters who boldly made the jump out of newsprint (okay, so this was back in the 50s and 60s, but hey).
Mark Trail is a natural: a comic book with nature stuff is kind of like toting around a bigger, flimsier copy of a Peterson bird guide or a Stebbens herpetology guide:
We’ve already seen a Rex Morgan publication on behalf of public health issues (I’m sure something like this was given away free):
But then there were Rex Morgan comics that required payment and seem to have dealt with private health matters:
Leading up to the ultimate, save-your-allowance-for-this-kids! comic book:
Ah, the good old days!
Finally! Out of the summer sun, the heady, fresh air, and away from that dreadful Charley Smith! At last Mary and Delilah can talk calmly and reasonably, like two adults, about the very same crap they’ve been hashing over for the last three weeks! O rapture!
I think if Mary’s going to have any influence on Delilah, she needs to treat the girl like one of Rex Morgan’s patients — do NOT let her wander off! Outdoors! Particularly by herself!
I know you love to worry and fret Mary, but there needs to be a little less theoretical hand-wringing and a little more hands-on grabbing and holding on tight and maybe some ropes involvement, too.
Oh, yeah, trust your own instincts, not some Canadian busy body — remember: Meddle in the U.S.A.!
Still, maybe this distraction on Mary’s part has a deeper meaning:
You know, sometimes a happy ending (well, the kind Mary Worth is angling for) just isn’t possible.
Rex is still asea (for so many reasons!), but things continue in Morganville. And the assisted health-care facility that Becka is working at seems to have more problems than she’d originally heard about:
Or, when life gives you a naked, wet, dripping Jeffy, make shameful, ruthless fun of him.
So, the 15 July 2009 Family Circus has little Jeffy answering the door naked and telling the unlucky woman on the stoop that his mother is giving him a bath and maybe she ought to come back later. Ha. Ha.
Funny thing, Jeffy was in the same position as Becky was in the Sunday Funky Winkerbean (yes, that Funky Winkerbean). Nice to know that if Becky can’t answer the door, we have a dependable substitute:
And there’s always just making fun of the strip (ahem) at hand:
And lest you think the Morgans’ cruise to the Bahamas or Barbados or Bora Bora or Barcelona is going well, think again:
Now with two options!
OPTION 1: Sexy, sexy, sexy! (yawn)
OPTION 2: Cruel, cruel, cruel!
[I guess the third option is to skip it altogether.]
(Well, Wolverine is tres cool. We just saw X-Men Origins: Wolverine at the cheap seats (one thin buck after 9 PM!)…mmmmmmm.)
Everyone has a little mutant in them; sometimes he just needs a mentor to help let it out. Or talk. Or make fun of a current storyline. Like “Horndog” and Wolverine.
Or Meddler and Wolverine.
[Yes, you really DO see Hugh’s ass in Wolverine!]
Sure, Sabertooth might be Logan’s brother, but it’s a very obscure fact that Ian Cameron (aka, “Narwhal”) is a distant cousin.
Kind of like the real X-Men, the number of mutants is staggering, particularly at Charterstone (it’s like Professor X’s Home for Craptacular Mutants), including the lovely Toby Cameron, aka “Velour”:
And last but not least, a one-time denizen finds her way back, lost and confused. So much for being a smarty-pants, eh, “Prodigy”?
Meanwhile, Mary (“Meddler”) just loses it altogether…
…I’m a mashup whore.
I like to think I’m loyal to Rex Morgan (“if I were on a desert island and could only mash one comic strip” sort of thing), but gee whiz, when an exciting, multi-layered, June-bikinied storyline is usurped by unhappily-married young couple, I start looking elsewhere.
Sometimes Judge Parker is fun, particularly when the temperatures are on the rise and shameless hussies like Dixie Julep and Godiva Danube (and even Det. Roberts) are va-va-vooming around.
And while Mary Worth‘s recent plots have been yawners, THIS is how to do an unhappily-married couple! Throw in an old flame who threatens to trample the last threads of the marriage AND give Mary a stroke! I <3 you, Charley!
Still, Mary is not one to go down without a fight. Delilah’s welfare was entrusted to her (not that anyone asked, mind you)…
[Ice cream truck courtesy of Crankshaft, whose only redeeming feature has been the appearance of Le Chat Bleu’s earthly-plane counterpart, Barney the DEATH CAT!!]
Mary does have her limits, however. In the 10 July 2009 strip, her mental prowess fails her at last, and she physically pulls Delilah away from Charley! (Several have speculated that this is known as “Full Contact Meddling.”)
AS IF! Delilah is far too enchanting, and Charley way too horny, to allow a little “yank the skank” (to quote CC’s eloquent Vakar) to get in the way. And then there’s Chinbeard’s surly cousin to consider…
Looks like Something Is Going To Happen over at Funky Winkerbean. Comic-book Guy, who’s always looked after Becky while her husband Wally was fighting oversees, or captured or dead, looks more despondent than the usual ‘Beantown denizen. And Becky is rummaging around for something.
Personally, I don’t care. But…when CC’s True Fable speculates on Becky’s quest, how could I resist?
